“CityNews” dining reviewer Wendy Johnson… “I’ve been the subject of a negative Twitter campaign, been accused of trying to ruin a family business and been called late at night by an irate restaurateur.” Photo by Gary Schafer
For me, dining out is about the overall experience. A warm smile. A genuine greeting. Efficient delivery of menus and water and innovative, yummy food.
I have struck gold in many eateries revelling in the moments when the elements of a quality dining experience combined in perfect harmony.
I’ve also suffered through disasters. I’ve been the subject of a negative Twitter campaign, been accused of trying to ruin a family business and been called late at night by an irate restaurateur.
Those who dine with me sometimes say I’m not harsh enough. Sometimes they giggle at how I describe “the experience”. Mostly they say I’m “spot on”.
So what are my tips for a great dining experience, for those in the biz and for customers?
Don’t call diners “guys”, especially when addressing a table of females. “Hi guys. Howzitgoin?” Yuck. How about “Good afternoon”?
Don’t wrap up cutlery in a serviette as if it’s a new-born baby in a blanket, especially damp cutlery. Diners don’t enjoy peeling the serviettes off. They often rip and who wants a wet serviette anyway?
Don’t charge extra for credit cards without notifying in advance. “Oh, there’s a $2 surcharge for using your card. Is that okay?” This is hardly appropriate when the customer is at the till. What if it’s not okay? Is the meal free?
Don’t interrupt conversations for permission to remove a plate or glass from one diner, especially when another at the table has not finished their drink or meal. It’s so rude. The interruption is usually awkward and why can’t staff bloody well wait? Are they being paid to hover?
Be knowledgeable, sensible and mature when serving. When asked about a dish, no diner wants to hear: “Dunno, never eat here”. Trust me, this happens. And more than you think.
Pay attention when pouring wine. Diners aren’t impressed with irregular pours. And even less impressed when their glass is topped up before it’s empty and then only to the pouring mark. Grrr.
Don’t play music that’s more for staff than customers and music that’s so loud it’s impossible to think. Grrr.
Trendy looking chairs that make your butt numb in five seconds? Get rid of them.
And your website? Make sure it’s up-to-date and accurate. Warning. Sometimes menus and opening times posted are wrong. Sometimes the eatery in question has even shut down.
But let’s not make this a one-sided story.
What about bad customers, especially those who feel they can act however they want because they’re paying. You don’t have this right. You’re a guest in a public place and should behave accordingly.
So don’t snap your fingers or gesticulate wildly to signal staff. This is plebeian behaviour. Catch the eye of a staff member and ask them to come by when they have a minute. Much more gracious.
Don’t talk on your mobile phone at the top of your lungs, especially when staff are trying to take your order.
Had a bad day? Don’t take it out on staff. How are they supposed to know you’re in the mood to kill someone?
Refrain from eating all your meal before complaining you didn’t like it. Diplomatically state your concerns early or lap it up, pay the bill and move on.
Be understanding. Things go wrong in hospitality just like they do at the office or at home. Staff phone in sick. Fridges break down. Produce is delivered late. The kitchen gets slammed with too many orders all at once. Try to be patient when it’s obvious that slow service can’t be avoided.
So there. You have it. What I adore. What I detest (some of it, anyway).
Gotta run. My 551st review is due soon!
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